I was talking with my mother about this post on Monday evening (Yeah, she’s a reader.) and she accused me of “judging” my suspect. I respectfully disagreed with her. I suggested that I’m not saying that what the suspect did was right or wrong. I’m taking full responsibility for my decision as to whether I will work under the conditions that he is placing on me. (I wonder. Is he taking full responsibility for his actions?) I’ve tried twice to write a detailed dissertation giving signals, explaining cause and effect, etc.

Dan, Dave and Pete made great comments that are on target and specific to this situation.

I’ll take a different approach.

Some people vote the party…Others vote the candidate.

Some prefer a small local bank…Others prefer one of the big three.

Is your CPA, lawyer, insurance agent, IT support, etc. a “one man show” or part of a large firm?

Do you prefer high end or cheapest? Blondes or brunettes? Coke or Pepsi?

Are you generally optimistic or pessimistic? (Either way, don’t you think that you’re a realist?)

My point is that we have certain beliefs and make certain decisions. We decide who we like. Who we want to do business with. When we’ll bend and when we’ll hold firm.

This suspect decides how he wants to live. If he wants to blow off appointments, it’s his perogative. If he wants to use big words, it’s his choice. If he wants to be “pulled into meetings” or not schedule enough time for his conference calls, he has the right. It’s his life. It’s his business and I have no right to object or try to change him.

On the flip side, if I insist on punctuality. If I intentionally schedule “fluff time” after my appointments to allow for run-over. If I use simple words to communicate. I recognize that some people will accuse me of being arrogant, too hard, or suggest that the world isn’t black and white and I’m OK with the risk that they won’t like me. Why isn’t that OK?

Even if he needs my help, he doesn’t have to admit it. Even if I need a sale, it doesn’t have to be him.

In this case, I will never schedule another call with this guy. However, I seriously doubt that he’ll ever ask for another chance. Isn’t it interesting that we agree?